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Nikki💓

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About Nikki💓

  • Birthday 03/16/1979

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  1. Nikki💓

    Poem Feedback

    I love this! I believe you already have the title " If my heart could speak"😀. I would keep it to a flow like this: If my heart could speak If my life collapsed This world would disappear Into the thinness of nothing.......ect.. I really love seeing the heart in this poem. Thank you!
  2. Nikki💓

    Prayer

    Dear Lord, For whatever days before me remain I will strive forward, fully equipped with my armor! I will cry out to you Lord, when this world becomes to heavy and I feel as if I cannot even crawl! I will remember to kneel Lord! To the One who I know can carry me through! I am but a sinner, an amazingly imperfect soul knocking at your door my Lord! Knowing full well your mercy Lord! Knowing very well your love, Lord! That of which, I will hold close to my heart, until the very last beat, until the day, I bow at your feet!
  3. Nikki💓

    Prayer Request

    I go quiet when in the midst of the muck. Fear of crying to loudly that all the pain deep inside will become exposed and I will be viewed as broken, no longer of use or good for nothing. I run far from these thoughts so they do not over take me. I want to protect others from the unleashing. Afraid, if they see the ugliness they will run far from me! So I retreat deep inside the comfort of my soul. The only place comfort can be found. The depth of my soul is where I find peace and rest, rejuvenation, clarification and the drive to carry on. Its where I can recall my purpose that God has laid before me! A place where I don't have to speak yet my words are heard and my heart is redeemed! My Lord reminds me of my worth and tells me to push forward, especially when I don't want to! His Love is divine and everlasting! Amen!
  4. Nikki💓

    Prayer Request

    Thank you💓
  5. Nikki💓

    Prayer Request

    Thank you💓
  6. Nikki💓

    Prayer Request

  7. Nikki💓

    Prayer Request

    Since posting the prayer request a few days ago my health has taken a drastic turn for the worst. I know whole heartedly that this situation is in God's hands and I am seeking my comfort in him. My concern is for my family, my husband, son and daughter. They have been through so much in the last 3 years with this. I have lost a significant amount of weight in just a few days, my face has sunk in and I am very weak. So many of you have poured out so much love and support and I am beyond grateful. For many days before posting my prayer request I argued with God about posting it. I knew the importance of people having knowledge of this condition and it was so heavy on my heart for those who do not have God and go through this. I struggled to post it because how I would feel with others knowing that I had gone through these things. My worst fear in that was that people would pity me or feel sorry for me. That is the last thing that I would want. I have endured so much in my life but I do not feel like a victim. God has empowered me and given me unbelievable strength to endure things that I have had to face. I believe I may be free of all of this suffering soon. Those who love me and have had to watch and suffer through this with me are the ones my concern is for at this time. I ask for prayers for my loved ones as they are fearful they are loosing me. Thank you so very much my sisters and brothers in Christ! God bless!
  8. Nikki💓

    Prayer Request

    Trumpeter,. Thank you so very much for sharing. I would like to meditate on what you have said before I reply. I so appreciate everything you shared💓
  9. Nikki💓

    Prayer Request

    Thank you! There are things that can help different symptoms and meds that can help to calm some anxiety. For me,. I have found meds to sometimes make things worse. The biggest help that I know of is DBT. The problem is that the brain when it comes to trauma can act in very unpredictable ways. It is hard for doctors and counseling professionals to know what treatments will help or may make worse. I so much appreciate your compassion and understanding. This walk has not been easy but God has been with me and has blessed my graciously along the way. My heart goes out to those who don't have him. My heart aches for how alone they must feel in their misery. I pray that God shows himself to them, so that they can see that they are truly not alone!
  10. Nikki💓

    Prayer Request

    I joined this group not all that long ago. I have already felt very encouraged and challenged in great ways with my writing. I have been ill for going on 3 years now. I was mostly bed ridden up until 6 months ago. God has been amazingly faithful to me in the darkest of times and the deepest depths of my despair. Only the people who are very closest to me know what is exactly going on. I don't tell people because my condition is not fully understood by our society. I endured severe trauma from abuse from the age of 3-12. I have very real physical symptoms that I experience at different times. The physical symptoms vary from rashes to swelling of limbs to catatonia and many other neurological symptoms. I stopped seeing the doctors on a regular basis 6 months ago, when I realized there was nothing they could do for me. My brain causes my body to literally torture me (physically and emotionally) at different times. I cannot claim that I am deprived in any way. God has blessed me emensly during this journey. I have been given such amazing clearity and understanding that has allowed me to grow so much closer to God. Could you please pray for those people out there who struggle with these kinds of things and don't have God. I could not keep going if it was not for God in my life. I write, so I wrote this to give some depth to what I have said: Lord, I have wounds cut so deep only you can heal them My body turns on me rejecting me Lord, my mind confuses me and lies to me At times I become so filled with self- doubt, failure, shame and despair that I just want to be numb Where I don't have to feel these feelings I care not to feel Events I care not to know Lord, I continue walking forward, pushing and crawling at times. I am reaching forward toward something that I don't know of its identity but I believe its there,so I press on!
  11. Nikki💓

    Pressing On

    What I am still left trying to find, despite all of the confliction in my mind. Unsure of my ending, everyday thoughts of surrendering. To the grim thoughts imbedded in my head. Always two steps forward, four steps back unable to get ahead. Wanting more out of this life, tired of the constant stress and strife. Continuing to keep my eyes on you, knowing your grace can heal and change the broken to brand new. When everything becomes so dark, your light shines through suddenly like a spark!. Showing a better path, far from my own wrath! Giving me another day, to bow down and continue to pray. For the unveiling of your purpose to keep my mind from running astray.
  12. Nikki💓

    A Christmas Prayer

    I enjoyed reading this poem. Very powerful and full of wonderful deep emotions. Thank you so much for sharing💓
  13. Nikki💓

    Come Walk With Me

    Absolutely wonderful!! I seriously started tearing up reading this. Very moving. I feel very blessed to read it. Thank you for sharing💓
  14. Nikki💓

    Winters Of Youth

    I loved this. It was exciting reading each written line full of such great imagery!!😃
  15. Nikki💓

    My Heart's Desire

    I really enjoyed reading your poem. Your words are gentle, yet powerful.
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